5. The Dad from Blank Check

Okay, this is just the role I always connect him to from my childhood, but you may know him better as “the father-in-law from Meet the Parents” or “The douchey headmaster from Scent of a Woman”. Either way, this guy always adds a great bald, white-guyness to his scenes. Fact is, this guy has 106 credits on IMDB, earning him a “that guy” spot in my book. So let’s give it up for the skeptical politician from Independence Day. May he always be there to play a dad or an asshole for us.

4. The Book Detective from Seinfeld

This guy, generally a cop of some sort, or a doctor, has managed to rack up 147 credits on IMDB without anyone knowing his name, impressive. I’ve gotten to know his work through is obvious friendship with one of my favorite directors, Paul Thomas Anderson, and I really like his stuff. That doesn’t mean, on the other hand, that I know his name. I mean, I just saw it because I’m researching him online right now, but I’ll probably forget it right after I finish writing this.

3. The Dad from Six Feet Under

We always applaud when one of our “that guy” actors is nominated for an Oscar, as this man did in 2009 for The Visitor. It’s too bad that, if he won, they would have said, “and the Oscar goes to… the psychiatrist from There’s Something About Mary!” I don’t want to poke too much fun, since I really do enjoy his performances, but he hasn’t earned a place in the name-memory bank of moviegoers so… he’s still “that guy”

2. Heywood from The Shawshank Redemption

I’ve actually had the pleasure of running into this guy in person a few times (he lives in my area); it’s the fact that I had to wonder if I knew him personally or from film that has earned his spot on this list. It also doesn’t hurt that, when I told my friends about seeing him I had to say “the guy from The Mist and Shawshank” to illicit a reaction from them. He’s a good actor and seemed to be a nice guy, but he’s still “that guy” nonetheless.

1. The Cook from Waiting…

Here’s another guy who’s made it over the 100 mark in IMDB credits and one of the few cast members who were bold enough to stick it out through Still Waiting…. He comes in at number one because of his hilarious performances and instant recognition without, of course, us ever learning his name. He has also appeared in a number of PTA’s movies, which doesn’t hurt getting my vote. He’s a good actor in comedy and drama alike. Just seeing his picture should set off your that-guy sense.

…and now, a moment to congratulate the actors who have made it out of that-guyness…

Philip Seymour Hoffman, John C. Reilly, Bill Hader, William H. Macy, Michael Clarke Duncan, Justin Long, Tim Meadows, Ed Helms, Zach Galifianakis, Jeremy Piven, I could go on, but I don’t want to flex my muscles here…

Coming Soon: Top 5 “That Girl” Actresses

5. “Tiny Dancer” – Almost Famous

I must admit, I don’t love this scene. I find it forced every time I see it, and I can’t help but wonder how they all know to skip a verse as they sing. That being said, this list is about songs being brought back to popularity through film. That’s exactly what happened here. Almost Famous brought “Tiny Dancer” up to being one of the most played Elton John songs out there. It earned the song a place in the hearts of this generation and a place on this list.

4. “I Touch Myself” – Austin Powers: International Man Of Mystery

I was just a kid when this movie came out, making me more vulnerable to the hilarious, forbidden, nipple-rubbing mania that was brought on from this scene. What could reignite a song like a dancing Austin Powers, Fembot heads exploding, and British flag undies? I never hear this song without thinking of this scene, and that’s the whole point of this list.

3. “Total Eclipse of The Heart” – Old School

First of all, a word about Old School: no one saw this film coming, but it reinvented the comedy genre and paved the road for the Apatowian comedy that we all know and love. That being said, thanks to The Dan Band, and their moving performance as Will Ferrell’s wedding band, most of us can’t decide whether or not to throw the “F” bomb into Bonnie Tyler’s song at various places. This classic scene has earned the Dan Band cameos in films such as Starsky and Hutch and, this summer’s smash success, The Hangover. Every time these guys show up on film, I think back to “Total Eclipse of The Heart”.

2. “These Eyes” – Superbad

Who can forget Michael Cera singing this hit from The Guess Who in Superbad? The scene, for those who don’t remember, consists of Evan, our meek yet heroic protagonist, being forced to sing for a few fight-craving cocaine fiends. I can’t help but wonder where a seventeen-year-old kid pulled this ditty from, but it makes for comedic genius. He brings the cokeheads to tears with his poor-at-best performance, and us to tears of laughter, earning his place on this list. To the current generation, The Guess Who’s hit from 1969 will forever be “the song from Superbad”.

1. “Bohemian Rhapsody” – Wayne’s World

This was a tough decision for me. I mean, who could ever say that this song, by Queen, could ever need “reigniting”? However, in the end, what is this list without this scene? When Wayne pops that cassette into the Mirth Mobile’s tape deck, history is made. It’s a classic “chicken egg” scenario: Did we start reacting to this song on the radio because of this scene? Or, was this scene made because of the way we all react to this song on the radio? Either was, if you haven’t had a full-car sing-a-long to “Bohemian Rhapsody”, you’ve led an incomplete life. That fact puts the song at number one.

5. “The Opening Scene” – Face/Off, John Woo, 1997

The Maniac: Nicholas Cage as Castor Troy

The Weapon: Mass Murdering Bomb

The Music: “The Hallelujah Chorus – Since By Man Came Death”

Talk about a scene that lines up a whole movie. We have Castor Troy, a painfully symbolic named terrorist, planting a bomb, prancing around and grabbing choirgirl’s asses. Here, Cage shows contempt for everything that is holy and love for chaos. The face he makes while grabbing the girl’s ass makes you wonder why old Nick ever left being a villain. My only complaint with the casting in the movie is that he doesn’t stay a villain for long.

4. “The Ringer” Scene – The Big Lebowski, The Coen Brothers, 1998

The Maniac: John Goodman as Walter Sobchak

The Weapon: An Uzi and Dirty Underwear

The Music: “Run Through the Jungle” by Creedence Clearwater Revival

You can argue with me about whether or not John Goodman’s character is a maniac, but

please consider his half-dazed, shell-shocked, Viet Nam rants before you do. In, by far, the funniest scene on this list, Walter dives out of the dude’s car with an Uzi and a “fool proof” plan.  Goodman solidifies his role as a lost veteran and idiot in this scene, let alone our love for this film. Suspenseful? Oddly. Great Music? Definitely. Funny? You bet your ass.

3. “The Art Museum” Scene – Batman, Tim Burton, 1989

The Maniac: Jack Nicholson as The Joker

The Weapon: Sleeping gas and paint

The Music: “Partyman” by Prince

I may be biased, because this film brought me into the world of superheroes and villains.  I can’t be sure when I first saw it (I was only two when it came out). I subscribe to the fact that Heath Ledger’s Joker trumps all preceding Batman bad guys, but old Jack’s Joker holds a special place in my heart. This scene nails down the purpose of the Joker in a dark, fun, symbolic, and musical way. As Michael Caine tells us, “Some people just want to watch the world burn.” The art museum scene is filmed proof that Burton didn’t drop the ball on this character trait; he does a great job of showing rather than telling. By destroying valuable art, the Joker shows utter contempt for the best our society has to offer, and by doing it to Prince, he shows a lack of regard for everything the 80’s had to offer, but, somehow, it works.

2.  “The Ear” Scene – Resevior Dogs, Quentin Tarantino, 1992

The Maniac: Michael Madsen as Mr. Blond/Vic Vega

The Weapon: A Straight Razor

The Music: “Stuck in The Middle With You” by Steelers Wheel

Let’s get one thing straight: The only reason this isn’t number one is my love for the following film. I’m well aware that this is a bigger deal to most readers (so, save your typing fingers in the comments).  Rewatching this classic scene, the first thing I noticed is that I felt like I was the one with my mouth taped shut. One almost hopes Madsen gives him a break and shoots him (as he hopelessly writhes to avoid the aim of the gun), but no, it can’t be that simple in a Tarantino film. This is one scene where the music takes a front seat. We know, that as Mr. Blond, in his rat packesque attire, flips on the radio to “K. Billy’s Super Sounds of the 70’s”, we are in for a sick and bumpy ride here. As the music gears up, Madsen begins to walk-dance like Grandpa Cohen at a Bar Mitzvah, and the rest is history. Here’s an equation for you: A Straight Razor + A maniac speaking into a disembodied ear + a one hit wonder = history.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LLTqecGbdCc

1.  “The Fake Drug Deal” Scene – Boogie Nights , Paul Thomas Anderson, 1997

The Maniac: Alfred Molina as Rahad Jackson

The Weapon: Firecrackers and a handgun

The Music: “Jessie’s Girl” by Rick Springfield / “Sister Christian” by Night Ranger

Here’s the rundown: we have a stripper and two male porn stars on their long, spiraling, downfall. They’ve decided the make a quick buck by participating in a fake drug deal (they have some fake cocaine, coated with a little bit of real cocaine for effect) with a local drug lord. We meet them in the car outside, where Todd (played by Tom Jane) reveals he has a gun. The three walk to the door of the house in a humorous image of unpreparedness. Unfortunately, they discover, upon arrival, that their buyer has been on quite the drug binge and is walking the thin line between sanity and anything but. The three con men sit on a couch as the most suspenseful scene I’ve ever seen commences. They hope to not get cause as: 1) several thugs weigh and inspect their fake cocaine, 2) Cosmo (he’s Chinese) lights firecrackers off continuously (our con men jump every time, but Rahad, the drug lord, is unphased), and 3) Rahad  smokes crack, and goes on a manic rant about his music while playing Russian Roulette with his favorite, most shiny gun. Let’s face it, I can’t do it any justice in text, but if you don’t believe that a fake drug deal, sporadic firecrackers, Russian Roulette, and mustached Karaoke can exist in the same scene, you’re wrong (just see for yourself). It makes for crazy suspense in one of my all time favorite films.